being lost in corporate japan
I often get asked to be a facilitator or mentor for women-led events at my company. I work at a major global company in Japan, which means there is an internal clash of values - with the company pushing for western values in a pretty conservative country. As someone that identifies as asexual, I didn't really realize how gender can be a barrier for women until I experienced it first-hand here in Japan. While I've learned to somewhat deal with the culture, I struggle to talk about my experience with others. That's why facilitating and mentoring can sometimes be a major challenge for me.
As I conduct these events, I amaze myself with the kindness and pureness the attendees and mentees have. At the same time, it makes me feel anxious that I don't have the drive and passion for work that they have. often feel like I have nothing meaningful to share - just floating between the rungs of corporate life.
Maybe just showing up to these events, being my pure self is what matters. I've found over the years that the most powerful tool is being my true, authentic self. I don't mean that I'm a silent bystander, but perhaps being a quiet ally is enough, for now...until I figure out who I want to be.